Saturday, October 10, 2015

Days 17 and 18. of 21. Groundhog Days.

These are the days it hits me. The I feel pretty good days that signal it's almost time to do another round. Fall break got busier than planned for me not planning anything. I think I've spent more time on base in the past 5 days than I have in the past 5 years. Each day thinking- I'll do this and that and such and then the day just kinda disappears. Running errands, stealing Phil for lunch.

Wednesday night it caught up to me. The running around like a normal Jen. By the time we were due at soccer I was tired. Like hit a wall tired. Phil and I got home about the same time and we threw together pasta for dinner. By the time we were done eating, my stomach was rebelling. I think about everything I ate wondering if it was something but really nothing major. I think it was my body just saying enough is enough.

Thursday I dropped the girls off at rehearsal and then just made some calls. I notice that Lily has a doctor's appointment tomorrow. I call our end nurse to see if we can switch hers and Phillip's appointments. She doesn't see the appointments in the system at all. We figure it out- put Phillip in the morning and I tell her I'll call to reschedule Lily. Phil had some time between meetings so I wandered over to the squadron to grab him for lunch. We sat at the golf course and watched planes taking off. Even though it's been busy- I like that I get to see him during the day before we both get too tired.

We discuss the next day. Somehow I need to get Phillip to a 9 O'clock, 2 hour appointment and the girls to rehearsal by 10. Well he is 16 now. He has an ID. I decide that I can drop him off, he can get checked in- I'll drop the girls off then go back and be there for the second half of the appointment. It will have to do. Phil offers to go pick Phillip up- which doesn't make sense since- once I drop the girls off I can go- the biggest thing is I had to cancel a coffee date. But I know how hard it is for him to break away from work now.

I get up early Friday and am texting with a friend who asks- wanna Skype? Her son has been battling cancer for years and the latest run has been throwing roadblock after roadblock in front of them. I wander downstairs and fire up the Skype- we chat, sometimes through tears, she gets her laundry folded- I'm directing children in this well thought out morning plan. I hate to hang up, but am glad we had a little while to chat.

I rally the children. We drop Phillip off at Tripler- traffic was again in our favor- gotta love break- I throw some cash to him and tell him to grab some breakfast before he checks in. We are on the way to base when the girls realize they forgot bags to put back stage. Phillip texts me that they don't have an appointment for him but they will squeeze him in at 10. Of course- that actually works better for me- but i feel like I am running around in circles. I tell him to get a bigger breakfast and I'll meet him by 10.

We stop and grab 3 bags, I drop the girls off- they are early so I wait a few minutes until a responsible adult arrives then I head back to Tripler. This is feeling like Groundhog day. I sit and wait with Phillip, we are called back shortly. The valet said they are closing at noon- but if I wanted I could just pick up the keys by then. I wonder if we will be out of the appointment in time- even though she is squeezing Phillip in, his doc is thorough. She is being shadowed by a resident and I debate if I want to knock off some general healthcare tasks or enlighten him on LFS. I decide to multi task- I mention Phillip has a plantar's wart that needs taken care of- would it be too much trouble while we are here? Not at all- does he need a flu shot too? Phillip starts to protest- I just had a shot. Yep different vaccine bud. No but I just had a flu shot last year- his eyes are twinkling. He knows they are an annual deal for him. Oh yes- that would be great. What about labs- yeah we probably need labs. When all is said and done he was jabbed 3 times and frozen with liquid nitrogen. His A1C is up- it's kinda a big picture of what his blood sugars have been doing. This means we have to play with his pump settings and insulin ratios a bit. Not a huge deal. Plus he's back in wrestling- it was bound to happen.

It's a bit after 11:30 when we finish- pretty efficient. We stop by the pharmacy and grab his insulin. We then go to Oncology to do my bloodwork. Hopefully this will save me a couple hours on Tuesday.  Oh yeah- Monday is a holiday- so we get an extra day. So I guess this cycle has 22 days. The receptionist says they are full to have a seat. I hand Phillip the parking stub and tip- tell him to go retrieve the keys then stop by the lab and get his blood drawn. He nods and ambles off. They call me right away and I get vitals done and head back to the chemo bay. Friday is a different crowd- I don't recognize anyone. I sit and wait for my turn. Phillip arrives just as Cindy is accessing my port- I don't think it makes him queasy but it bothers him- I can just feel it. We talk about lunch options.

The plan was to head to the NEX and get lunch, him a haircut and shop a bit. It's almost noon. I'm tired, he is a bit restless. He asks if we can just do panda express. Sure. After 3 pokes and a wart freezing- he can have whatever he wants. You don't want to go to the NEx do you? He shakes his head. Ok- you want me just to take you home. He nods- if it isn't too much trouble. It occurred to me that Kiera has AFD(Amazing Food Detective- it's a healthy eating, exercise platform for Kaiser- they tour around doing shows at schools) rehearsal at 3, he has wrestling at 3- one of them would be late. It makes sense to take him home-even if it is an extra trip- it alleviates some stress. I am starving- I forgot breakfast in the rush. I have that- I spend my morning at tripler and running around headache. He offers to drive so I can eat. Oh why not. It's pretty much bumper to bumper traffic anyhow.

We get home, I lay on the couch for 10 minutes, pour myself a coffee and head back out the door. Groundhog day. I get the girls, drop Kiera off get home and Lily and Bella are at each other. Lily seems more tired so I send Bella over to her aunt's house. Lily throws a fit. A preteen- I hate you why do you hate me so much kind of yelling fit. It's all I can do not to strangle her or roll my eyes. Leave the drama on the stage princess. She stomps upstairs and slams the door. Normally I would correct this behavior but I am just too tired. I lay down on the couch and stare at the back of my eyelids. I hear her ranting and ranting upstairs. It gets quiet- I open my eyes and she is trying to sneak out the door. Nice try - go back upstairs. More stomping, more yelling, more slamming.  The next thing I know I hear the phone. Shit- I fell asleep- 7 missed texts, 5 missed calls 2 messages. It's only been like 20 minutes! Kiera is done early. I go upstairs, Lily fell asleep. I wake her carefully- and tell her she can go to her cousins now. Ok, she hugs me and skips out the door.

She spends the rest of the night giving me hugs. I grab Kiera who has plans to go to a haunted plantation with her friends. Not thanks- I say- life is scary enough on its own. Plus Phil texts me that he found a treat my friend recommended.

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Lily Kay Monkey

Lily Kay Monkey
November 2008 Photographed by Shelley Detton (7 Layer Studio)